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| + | [[File:Queerplatonic Flag.png|thumb|203x203px|''Queerplatonic'' flag by anonymous.]] |
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| − | <p style="font-weight:normal;">'''A queerplatonic''' relationship (or "QPR") or queerplatonic partnership ("QPP") is an umbrella expression to indicate that a relationship defies the divide between romantic partnership and "just" friends. ''Queerplatonic'' has been used to describe feelings and relationships of either/both a nonromantic or ambiguously-romantic nature, in order to express that they break social norms for platonic relationships. It can be characterized by a strong bond, affect, and emotional commitment not regarded by those involved as something beyond a friendship.</p> |
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| + | <p style="font-weight:normal;">'''Queerplatonic relationship''' (also called a '''quasiplatonic relationship''', '''quirkyplatonic relationship''', or '''qplatonic relationship''') is a term for an intimate, ''non-romantic'' committed relationship and is abbreviated to '''QPR''' for short. It typically refers to a relationship that bends the lines between a ''[[Romantic Attraction|romantic]]'' relationships and a ''non-romantic'' relationships. </p><p style="font-weight:normal;">''Queerplatonic relationships'' are common among ''a-spec'' individuals, however one does not have to identify as ''a-spec'' to be in one. One also does not have to be ''queer'' to be in a ''queerplatonic relationship''. Pursuing a ''queerplatonic relationship'' is not necessarily mutually exclusive with pursuing ''romantic'' relationships. A ''queerplatonic'' ''relationship'' can be ''monogamous'' or ''polyamorous'' (involving more than two individuals). It is very common for ''[[Aromantic Allosexual|aroallos]]'', ''[[Aromantic Asexual|aroaces]]'', and ''[[Alloromantic|alloro]]<nowiki/>aces'' to be in this kind of relationship.</p><p style="font-weight:normal;">Individuals in ''queerplatonic relationships'' might refer to each other as their ''queerplatonic'' partner (QPP), ''marshmallow''/''mallowfriend'', or as ''zucchini'' (a term that was originally a joke in the ''a-spec'' community about lacking a word to properly describe the term).</p><p style="font-weight:normal;">A ''queerplatonic'' "''crush''" is most commonly called a ''[[squish]]'' (the same as a ''[[Platonic Attraction|platonic]]'' ''crush''), and is less commonly called a ''plush'', ''squash'', or ''crish''.</p><p style="font-weight:normal;">'''Funfact''': Every third saturday of July is ''[[QPR Day|Queerplatonic Relationship Day]]''. It is a day for celebration and qpr visibility.<ref>https://dragonheartetk.tumblr.com/post/623832098800910336/its-this-saturday</ref> </p> |
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| − | <p style="font-weight:normal;">It is a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Platonic_love#Evolution_of_platonic_love so-called] platonic relationship, so it does not contain sexuality/eroticism or romance, although some people involved in light or non-traditional romantic relationship might also categorize themselves as being queerplatonic. As a non-romantic relationship, people in a queerplatonic relationship are not restricted to have just one queerplatonic partner ("QP" or "QPP"). Because <span style="font-weight:normal;">queerplatonic</span> relationships are not based on exclusivity, a participant of the relationship may have multiple QPPs and exclusive relationships (romantic or sexual) with a third party not involved in the relationship.</p> |
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| + | == History == |
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| − | <p style="font-weight:normal;">For example, some of the social norms for friendship, in some cultures, dictate that friendships are emotionally shallow compared to romance, are fleeting, short-term, or noncommited, and do not involve partnership ties. Social norms for romantic relationships dictate that romantic relationships will always be more important than friendships, that romantic partners should move in together and coordinate their lives together as a monogamous pair, and that only romantic partners should adopt, raise children, or even engage in certain forms of affection such as kissing or hand-holding. In her book ''Minimizing marriage'', contemporary philosopher Elizabeth Brake talks about those norms, a concept that is adverse to queerplatonic thought, naming it "[https://elizabethbrake.com/amatonormativity/ amatonormativity]": "the disproportionate focus on marital and amorous love relationships as special sites of value, and the assumption that romantic love is a universal goal. Amatonormativity consists in the assumption that a central, exclusive, amorous relationship is normal for humans, in that it is a universally shared goal, and that such a relationship is normative, in that should be aimed at in preference to other relationship types." Relationships can be considered queerplatonic when they break norms similar to those. As an example of what those norms forbid, in some situations the people involved in queerplatonic relationships can show physical affection such as cheek kisses, pecks on the lips, holding hands, sitting on each other's lap, seeing each other naked, cuddling and sleeping together (not euphemistically). To QPPs, these activities are not necessarily romantic nor sexual/erotic.</p> |
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| + | <p style="font-weight:normal;">The terminology around ''queerplatonic relationships'' was first documented in 2010 in an online thread called ''Kaz’s Scribblings''.<ref>[https://kaz.dreamwidth.org/238564.html?thread=1342436 A/romanticism]</ref> Since the word queerplatonic originated in late 2010, by the time 2011 rolled around it quickly gained popularity among online users. </p>It described an ''aromantic'' form of a connection with someone that were outside the boxes of friendship and/or romance. In spring 2014, the phrase ''quasiplatonic'' relationships was coined for ''a-spec'' people who were uncomfortable with using the word queer.<ref>https://aromanticnerd.tumblr.com/post/85605141698/do-you-think-quasiplatonic-would-be-another-good-qp</ref> |
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| + | Sometime between the coinage and the summer of 2015, ''[http://pride-flags-for-us.tumblr.com/post/104476575164/thechaoshat-ok-so-me-and-glitch-here-designed pride-flags-for-us]'' made a flag for ''queerplatonic relationships''.<ref>https://pride-flags-for-us.tumblr.com/post/104476575164/thechaoshat-ok-so-me-and-glitch-here-designed</ref><ref>https://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/120543-queerplatonic-pride-flag/</ref> Then on August 21<sup>st</sup>, an anonymous ''DeviantArt'' user made a flag for ''queerplatonic relationships''.<ref>https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Queerplatonic-Quasiplatonic-Quirkyplatonic-1-555351036</ref> |
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| − | <p style="font-weight:normal;">As an umbrella term, participants in queerplatonic relationships may choose any terminology they like for each other. The people involved do not have to identify as "queer", it is a type of relationship experienced by and available to anybody regardless of their sexual orientation, romantic orientation, or (non-)monogamy. These participants may consider themselves friends, partners, life-partners, a couple, a triad, or use any other words that suit them. There is also a queerplatonic-specific partner term, as well -- "zucchini". As in, "they're my zucchini", originally a joke within the aromantic asexual community, underscoring the lack of words in mainstream relationship discourse to signify meaningful relationships that do not follow the standard and expected sexual/romantic norms, and frustration with the erasure of other kinds of intimacy, which were perceived as equally valuable to the sexual/romantic model. "Squish", which is used as the platonic version of "crush", is another term to describe partners in queerplatonic relationships - even if the queerplatonic relationship has its own term "plush" as an alternative for "crush".</p> |
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| + | On September 9<sup>th</sup>, 2020, dandelion-ambrosius made a flag for ''polyamous queerplatonic relationships.''<ref>https://dandelion-ambrosius.tumblr.com/post/628841908395966464/polyplatonicpolyqueerplatonic-flag</ref> |
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| − | <p style="font-weight:normal;">The term "queerplatonic," first developed by Kaz and S. E. Smith in 2010,<ref>[https://kaz.dreamwidth.org/238564.html?thread=1342436 A/romanticism] |
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| − | </ref> is a combination of the term ''[[platonic]]'' with the term ''queer'', as in different.<ref>[https://theacetheist.wordpress.com/2019/03/09/a-genealogy-of-queerplatonic/ A Genealogy of Queerplatonic] |
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| − | </ref> It is open to being used by people of any identity.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20161023235234/http:/realsesmith.tumblr.com/post/2868581031/word-of-the-day-queerplatonic Word of the Day: Queerplatonic]</ref> Tumblr user ‹spectra-fidelis› described queerplatonic relationships [http://acesecrets.tumblr.com/post/15254954707 thus]:</p> |
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| − | <blockquote style="font-weight:normal;">"if you'd picture romance with taper candles over dinner, and sexual relationship as a queen bed, I would try picturing the queerplatonic as string lights over tea and a bunk bed with tin can-and-wire phones between them. The same, but not."</blockquote> |
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| + | On January 31<sup>st</sup>, 2021, ''[https://rjalker.tumblr.com/ rjalker]'' made an alternative ''queerplatonic'' flag.<ref>https://rjalker.tumblr.com/post/641883413894266880/id-a-flag-with-three-horizontal-stripes-of-pale</ref> Then on July 25<sup>th</sup>, ''[https://neopronouns.tumblr.com/ neopronouns]'' made an alternative flag for ''polyplatonic relationships''.<ref>https://neopronouns.tumblr.com/post/657722031754838016/just-symbol-flag-with-symbol-just-flag</ref> |
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| − | <p style="font-weight:normal;">According to ''The Oxford English dictionary'', the first registered examples of the meaning "Strange, odd, peculiar, eccentric, in appearance or character" for ''queer'' (1508) predate in more than four centuries a meaning that directly implies 'not heterosexual or cisgender' (1922). Although the use of ''queerplatonic'' for the concept presented in this article is a 21st-century phenomenon, adjectifying something platonic as "queer" is not recent, as show the three following examples: "indulging in a queer, platonic flirtation", 1936;<ref>Dorothy Margaret Stuart. Molly Lepell, Lady Hervey. London: G.G. Harrap, 1936. [https://books.google.com/books?id=KHgDAAAAMAAJ&q=%22Queer-platonic%22 p. 169].</ref> "What a queer chap you are, he says, with your Platonic love! [/] Queer. . .Platonic . . .", 1971;<ref>Morris Beja (compiler). ''Psychological Fiction''. London: Scott, Foresman and Co., 1971. [https://books.google.com/books?id=9gTzAAAAMAAJ&q=%22Queer+platonic%22 p. 154].</ref> "he talks in that queer platonic vein at the end of Faust", 1994.<ref>The letters of John Cowper Powys to Frances Gregg. London: Cecil Woolf, 1994. v. 1, [https://books.google.ca/books?id=r-iOvgAACAAJq=queer+platonic p. 73].</ref> Due to the controversy surrounding the reclamation of <nowiki>''queer''</nowiki> in some spaces, however, there are alternatives to ''queerplatonic'' such as is "quasiplatonic" or "quirkyplatonic".</p> |
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| + | == Flags + Details == |
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| − | <p style="font-weight:normal;">QPRs are celebrated on [[QPR Day]], which occurs on the third Saturday of July.</p> |
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| + | File:Pride-flags-for-us QPR Flag.png|Queerplatonic relationship flag by pride-flags-for-us on Tumblr. |
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| + | File:Queerplatonic Flag.png|Queerplatonic flag by anonymous on DeviantArt. |
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| + | File:Rjalker Queerplatonic Flag.png|Alternative queerplatonic relationship flag by rjalker on Tumblr. |
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| + | </gallery><p style="font-weight:normal;">'''Polyplatonic (polyqueerplatonic) flags:'''</p><gallery> |
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| + | File:Dandelion-ambrosius Polyplatonic Flag.png|Polyplatonic flag by dandelion-ambrosius on Tumblr. |
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| + | File:Polyplatonic Flag.png|Alternative polyplatonic relationship flag by neopronouns on Tumblr. |
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| + | </gallery> |
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| + | == References == |
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| − | </p> |
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| − | ''' |
+ | '''Extra''' |
| + | # https://writingfromfactorx.wordpress.com/2011/07/11/my-thoughts-on-the-word-zucchini/ |
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| ⚫ | |||
| + | # https://theacetheist.wordpress.com/2019/03/09/a-genealogy-of-queerplatonic/ |
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| + | #https://taimi.com/wiki/queerplatonic-relationship-what-is-it-what-does-it-mean<br /> |
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Revision as of 03:12, 27 June 2022
Queerplatonic flag by anonymous.
Queerplatonic relationship (also called a quasiplatonic relationship, quirkyplatonic relationship, or qplatonic relationship) is a term for an intimate, non-romantic committed relationship and is abbreviated to QPR for short. It typically refers to a relationship that bends the lines between a romantic relationships and a non-romantic relationships.
Queerplatonic relationships are common among a-spec individuals, however one does not have to identify as a-spec to be in one. One also does not have to be queer to be in a queerplatonic relationship. Pursuing a queerplatonic relationship is not necessarily mutually exclusive with pursuing romantic relationships. A queerplatonic relationship can be monogamous or polyamorous (involving more than two individuals). It is very common for aroallos, aroaces, and alloroaces to be in this kind of relationship.
Individuals in queerplatonic relationships might refer to each other as their queerplatonic partner (QPP), marshmallow/mallowfriend, or as zucchini (a term that was originally a joke in the a-spec community about lacking a word to properly describe the term).
A queerplatonic "crush" is most commonly called a squish (the same as a platonic crush), and is less commonly called a plush, squash, or crish.
Funfact: Every third saturday of July is Queerplatonic Relationship Day. It is a day for celebration and qpr visibility.[1]
History
The terminology around queerplatonic relationships was first documented in 2010 in an online thread called Kaz’s Scribblings.[2] Since the word queerplatonic originated in late 2010, by the time 2011 rolled around it quickly gained popularity among online users.
It described an aromantic form of a connection with someone that were outside the boxes of friendship and/or romance. In spring 2014, the phrase quasiplatonic relationships was coined for a-spec people who were uncomfortable with using the word queer.[3]
Sometime between the coinage and the summer of 2015, pride-flags-for-us made a flag for queerplatonic relationships.[4][5] Then on August 21st, an anonymous DeviantArt user made a flag for queerplatonic relationships.[6]
On September 9th, 2020, dandelion-ambrosius made a flag for polyamous queerplatonic relationships.[7]
On January 31st, 2021, rjalker made an alternative queerplatonic flag.[8] Then on July 25th, neopronouns made an alternative flag for polyplatonic relationships.[9]
Flags + Details
Queerplatonic flags:
Queerplatonic relationship flag by pride-flags-for-us on Tumblr.
Queerplatonic flag by anonymous on DeviantArt.
Alternative queerplatonic relationship flag by rjalker on Tumblr.
Polyplatonic (polyqueerplatonic) flags:
Polyplatonic flag by dandelion-ambrosius on Tumblr.
Alternative polyplatonic relationship flag by neopronouns on Tumblr.
References
Main
- ↑ https://dragonheartetk.tumblr.com/post/623832098800910336/its-this-saturday
- ↑ A/romanticism
- ↑ https://aromanticnerd.tumblr.com/post/85605141698/do-you-think-quasiplatonic-would-be-another-good-qp
- ↑ https://pride-flags-for-us.tumblr.com/post/104476575164/thechaoshat-ok-so-me-and-glitch-here-designed
- ↑ https://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/120543-queerplatonic-pride-flag/
- ↑ https://www.deviantart.com/pride-flags/art/Queerplatonic-Quasiplatonic-Quirkyplatonic-1-555351036
- ↑ https://dandelion-ambrosius.tumblr.com/post/628841908395966464/polyplatonicpolyqueerplatonic-flag
- ↑ https://rjalker.tumblr.com/post/641883413894266880/id-a-flag-with-three-horizontal-stripes-of-pale
- ↑ https://neopronouns.tumblr.com/post/657722031754838016/just-symbol-flag-with-symbol-just-flag
Extra